8 things that will make your wife want to beat you up

8. Growing a mustache
7. Coming into bed after your wife is asleep and "making a move"
6. Talking about how awesome Fuddrucker's hamburgers are when your wife is on a diet
5. Trimming your beard hair and leaving it in the sink
4. Taking 45 minutes to poop
3. Starting a project, never finishing it but leaving it in the garage forever
2. Using up all the DVR memory to record basketball games you will never watch
1. Getting out of cleaning the kitchen because you promise you will do it the next day... then still not clean it.

I'm sure I could think of more than 8 things but I have to go clean the kitchen.